Encom Intranet

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=== March 25, 2010 === === March 25, 2010 ===
[[Arcadeaid.com]] provides a [[Cheatcode|tool to crack employee logins]], revealing the employee IDs and passwords for a number of Encom employees. [[Arcadeaid.com]] provides a [[Cheatcode|tool to crack employee logins]], revealing the employee IDs and passwords for a number of Encom employees.
 +
 +=== April 7, 2010 ===
 +Attempting to access the accounts gained through Arcadeaid.com/Cheatcode brings up the following message:
 +<blockquote>
 +ACCESS INFRACTION!<br>
 +You have entered a password that is no longer valid.<br>
 +We recently purged the system of users who were attempting to hack into various executives’ intranet pages - '''THIS IS A SERIOUS OFFENSE'''.<br>
 +If you have any information as to the identities of these individuals, you should immediately forward the information to the appropriate supervisor.<br>
 +However, if you are an executive who has accidentally entered an old password, please accept our apologies for the inconvenience. Our Technical Staff will coordinate with your assistants to reestablish your access with no further disruption to you.<br>
 +</blockquote>
 +
 +=== May 13, 2010 ===
 +As indicated by a thread on the Flynn Lives message boards, attempting to log in with a Group 7 badge ID yields the following response:
 +<blockquote>
 +SYSTEM UNDER MAINTENANCE<br>
 +We're sorry, but the Encom Employee Intranet is currently undergoing some restructuring and cannot be accessed at this time. If you have any questions or concerns, please consult your immediate supervisor.<br>
 +Thank you for your cooperation.
 +</blockquote>
<br clear="both" /> <br clear="both" />
Line 25: Line 43:
[[Image:IntranetAlanBradleyHomePage.jpeg|145px|thumb|Home page of Encom's Intranet,Updated]] [[Image:IntranetAlanBradleyHomePage.jpeg|145px|thumb|Home page of Encom's Intranet,Updated]]
===== Announcements and Notices ===== ===== Announcements and Notices =====
 +<blockquote>
 +{| align="right" class="clipframe"
 +|[[Image:IntranetAnnouncementsandNotices8.jpeg|100px]]
 +|}
 +''Week of May 3-7, 2010''<br>
 +'''"Space Paranoids" Is Here'''
 +<br>
 +:We have conquered the glitches, programming issues and general peculiarities of "Space Paranoids Online" and we're pleased to announce that the program is finally ready for public consumption.
 +<br>
 +:This online release already has a built-in fanbase (seeing as how it's based on one of the most popular arcade games of all time), but it also boasts some brand new features, including:
 +<br>
 +:* Advanced tank design
 +<br>
 +:* More levels
 +<br>
 +:* Greater firepower
 +<br>
 +:* New enemies
 +<br>
 +:* Cool sound effects
 +<br>
 +:Are we ready for the next phase of Encom's unparalleled success? Get on board, because this tank is charging toward a bright future, and there's no turning back!
 +<br>
 +'''20 Years of Dedication'''
 +<br>
 +:Even before the whole "global warming" debate began, Alan Bradley was committed to conservation, ecology and renewable solutions. In the past, Encom used a vast network of smaller companies to ship our products to markets around the world – redundancies and spotty management led to wastefulness of time and resources. Encom required dependable, dedicated transport services and Alan Bradley saw the opportunity for us to save money and reinvent overseas distribution.
 +<br>
 +:Our Dumont Shipping line is now the green standard in sustainable transport -- we're leading the way in keeping our oceans healthy, not to mention consolidating our efforts in rail, trucking and air shipments, as well.
 +</blockquote>
 +
 +<br clear="both" />
 +
 +<blockquote>
 +{| align="right" class="clipframe"
 +|[[Image:IntranetAnnouncementsandNotices7.jpeg|100px]]
 +|}
 +''Week of April 26-30''<br>
 +'''A Five-Star Hiring Shift'''
 +<br>
 +:Our employees deserve the very best of everything. That's why we have just overhauled the kitchen staff at Encom commissaries around the world. The new hires (including some of the most promising chefs from Paris, New York and Tokyo) will be better equipped to provide a true gourmet dining experience for you, our cherished workers. For instance, "Hot dog Tuesdays" will be replaced by "Mardi avec Duck à l'Orange." C'est magnifique!
 +<br>
 +:DISCLAIMER: Due to the exotic nature of the ingredients our new staff will be using, you might endure some strange allergic reactions to the updated menu items. Encom International is not responsible for such an occurrence - check the nutritional data of your food before eating it.
 +</blockquote>
 +
 +<br clear="both" />
 +
 +<blockquote>
 +{| align="right" class="clipframe"
 +|[[Image:IntranetAnnouncementsandNotices6.jpeg|100px]]
 +|}
 +''Week of April 19-23, 2010''<br>
 +'''Annual Blood Drive'''
 +<br>
 +:It's that time of year again: Encom International is encouraging, but in no way requiring, employees to donate blood next week. This is our chance to give back to the community, to band together as a team, and to show the world what a benevolent organization we really are.
 +<br>
 +:Studies indicate that one quarter (25%) of Americans will require a blood transfusion at some time in their lives. Unfortunately, only about 5% of all healthy citizens actually give to the cause. Will it be your spouse, your parent, or your child who needs the next batch? How can we turn our backs to those in need?
 +<br>
 +:For those of you who are interested in participating, please check your local branch for specific donation times, locations and further details. Thank you in advance for helping, and for putting Encom at the top of the list when it comes to philanthropic initiatives.
 +<br>
 +'''EncomInternational.com Is the Toast of the Internet'''
 +<br>
 +:We logged a record number of hits to our website last week - congratulations are in order! This just proves that the Encom brand is as vibrant as ever and the masses are ready to see what's ahead on the horizon.
 +</blockquote>
 +
 +<br clear="both" />
 +
 +<blockquote>
 +{| align="right" class="clipframe"
 +|[[Image:IntranetAnnouncementsandNotices5.jpeg|100px]]
 +|}
 +''Week of April 12-16, 2010''<br>
 +'''Coming Soon to a Browser Near You...'''
 +<br>
 +:We're still firing on all cylinders to get Space Paranoids Online... well, online. But, in the meantime, check out the teaser trailer, complete with a sneak peek of new tanks and levels!
 +<br>
 +:We're still working out the final programming details, but this should tide over our rabid fanbase until we have a firm release date.
 +<br>
 +'''Kurt Hardington Makes the "Most Generous" List'''
 +<br>
 +:In an independently funded exposé on the biggest philanthropists in America, Encom's own Kurt Hardington ranked #87 when it comes to charitable donations for the past fiscal year. We've always known that our CEO is a giving, nurturing person, but now the rest of the world has proof. Congratulations, Mr. Hardington - you may be #87 on their list, but you're #1 on ours!
 +</blockquote>
 +
 +<br clear="both" />
 +
 +<blockquote>
 +{| align="right" class="clipframe"
 +|[[Image:IntranetAnnouncementsandNotices4.jpeg|100px]]
 +|}
 +''Week of April 5-9, 2010''<br>
 +'''"Space Paranoids" Nears Final Beta-Testing Stage'''
 +<br>
 +:Ever since Alan Bradley told the world that an arcade favorite, Space Paranoids, would be arriving soon via the internet, consumers' response has been thunderous. Fans are ready for the next era in Encom gaming, and we're ready to deliver. Unfortunately, our quality control efforts over the past few weeks and months have not been completely fruitful. "Space Paranoids Online" contains an alarming number of glitches, programming issues and general peculiarities - QC will have to be stepped up immediately.
 +<br>
 +:[Space Paranoids logo]
 +<br>
 +:IMPORTANT: As always, this information is confidential. Encom never promised an exact date of release for "Space Paranoids," so we can move forward with our rollout in a manner that best showcases the product and our company brand as a whole.
 +<br>
 +:Encom Welcomes New Head of Transportation
 +<br>
 +:Our recent press event in San Francisco illuminated some real pros and cons when it comes to Encom's transpo detail. Sure, we have increased efficiency 18% over the past two years. And yes, accidents are down 26% for that same time period. And, of course, our fleet of choppers is the best looking fleet in corporate America.
 +<br>
 +:[smiling suit & tie man with a few people in blurred background]
 +<br>
 +:However, security and accountability have been somewhat of an issue as of late. That's why Nate Hardington has been named Encom's new Head of Transportation, effective immediately. His proud uncle, Kurt, is sure that Nate is the perfect man for the job. "I remember when little Nate was playing with toy trucks and boats. Well now, he's in charge of a worldwide armada of trucks and boats – it seems only fitting."
 +</blockquote>
 +
 +<br clear="both" />
 +
 +<blockquote>
 +{| align="right" class="clipframe"
 +|[[Image:IntranetAnnoucementsandNotices3.jpeg|100px]]
 +|}
 +''Week of March 29-April 2, 2010''<br>
 +'''Alan Bradley Represents the Very Best of Encom'''
 +:Don't forget... the Encom Press Conference is taking place at 8PM this Friday, April 2nd, at the Justin Herman Plaza in downtown San Francisco. This year will be very special indeed, as the main address will be given by none other than – Alan Bradley.
 +<br>
 +:[Alan Bradley close up pic]
 +<br>
 +:With his decades of unrivaled experience, Mr. Bradley is the perfect representative to announce our product plans to the world and usher in this new era of Encom.
 +<br>
 +:All local employees are expected to attend. If you signed up previously as a volunteer to help with this event, please check with your immediate supervisor for your assignment and schedule.
 +<br>
 +'''Team Building Exercise a Resounding Success'''
 +<br>
 +:Birds chirping in a field... wind whistling through the meadow... a paintball nugget smacking Tina from accounting. These were the sounds of our annual team-building retreat to Gnudson's Hollow.
 +<br>
 +:[cranes building the word TEAM]
 +<br>
 +:It was four days and three nights of increased communication, trust exercises and camaraderie. Never before have we been so unified as a team, and never again will we have to witness Gene performing the hokey-pokey in Pig Latin (hopefully).
 +<br>
 +:So, I say a hearty "thank you" to all of my new friends and old co-workers. Hope to see you all back there next year!
 +</blockquote>
 +
 +<br clear="both" />
 +
<blockquote> <blockquote>
{| align="right" class="clipframe" {| align="right" class="clipframe"
Line 50: Line 203:
:Make no mistake: with everyone's cooperation, we will get this effort back on track, hopefully sooner rather than later. :Make no mistake: with everyone's cooperation, we will get this effort back on track, hopefully sooner rather than later.
</blockquote> </blockquote>
 +
 +<br clear="both" />
<blockquote> <blockquote>
Line 88: Line 243:
<br clear="both"> <br clear="both">
-===== [[Group 7]] Updates =====+ 
 +===== Group 7 Updates =====
 +* [[Intranet/Group 7|Group 7 Emails]]
{| align="right" class="clipframe" {| align="right" class="clipframe"
-|[[Image:IntranetGroup7Updates1.jpeg|100px]]+|[[Image:IntranetGroup7Update5.jpeg|100px]]
|} |}
<blockquote> <blockquote>
 +'''Hard Work Pays Off'''
 +:Thursday, May 6th
 +<br>
 +:Now that Space Paranoids is blasting its way onto computers around the globe, it’s time to congratulate all of the programmers, sales reps and other employees who made this project come to life. Thousands of man-hours went into developing “S.P. Online,” and we don’t want anything to sully the good name of this product… or Encom as a whole.
 +<br>
 +:That’s why we must remind you not to dwell on any issues you may have with the finished product.
 +<br>
 +:Lots of games are released with slight idiosyncrasies still lurking in their code, but we don’t need to publicize the matter. After all, this is a classic title that was created decades ago – the peculiarities are what give Space Paranoids its charm.
 +<br>
 +'''New Policy – Illnesses Must Be Proven'''
 +:Thursday, May 6th
 +<br>
 +:Our records show that several employees have been using up their sick days just before they expire. The coincidence seems suspicious, so Encom is now implementing our latest policy: doctors’ notes will be required for all absences.
 +<br>
 +:However, don’t try and game the system by getting an excuse from just any physician. The following is a list of specialists from whom we will NOT accept doctors’ notes:
 +<br>
 +:* Podiatrists
 +<br>
 +:* Chiropractors
 +<br>
 +:* Pediatricians
 +<br>
 +:* Botanists
 +<br>
 +:Be advised: any unexcused absences will result in loss of salary and/or disciplinary action, possibly termination.
 +</blockquote>
 +
 +<br clear="both" />
 +
 +{| align="right" class="clipframe"
 +|[[Image:IntranetGroup7Updates4.jpeg|100px]]
 +|}
 +<blockquote>
 +'''McClaskey Airstrip Welcomes Back Group 7'''
 +:Wednesday, April 28th
 +<br>
 +:We are happy to report that a missing company helicopter has turned up, safe and sound, at McClaskey Airstrip, home to Encom's executive fleet of aircraft. Our longstanding travel partners chalked it up to an inventory mishap, while a note found attached to the pilot door read, "I'm leaving the bird back where I found it - thanks!" Since the communiqué wasn't signed, it is assumed that one of the maintenance crew wrote it after relocating the chopper from one hangar to another.
 +<br>
 +:Due to these recent developments, the moratorium placed on Group 7 travel through McClaskey has been lifted, and all groups may revert back to standard travel protocol procedures as they pertain to their respective departments.
 +<br>
 +:Also, there have been a number of changes in security measures, so it is advised that all travelers allow for extra time to pre-board their respective flights.
 +<br>
 +'''Giving Blood Does Not Excuse You From Your Work Duties'''
 +:Friday, April 23rd
 +<br>
 +:Just to be clear: if you decide to donate blood as part of our annual drive, you must schedule your procedure on a designated break or lunch hour. We don't want a repeat of last year (when Group 7 productivity for the week fell an unprecedented 12%).
 +<br>
 +:Once you have finished with your civic responsibilities, you need to attend to your Encom responsibilities. You will not be excused for reasons of fatigue, nausea or faintness (we have heard these stories before - they just won't be accepted).
 +<br>
 +'''QC Hiring Freeze In Effect'''
 +:Wednesday, April 14th
 +<br>
 +:Until further notice, we are not bringing on any new testers for our forthcoming line of products. In fact, we might be letting go of our last crop of hires sooner than expected. If you have questions as to the protocol involved with terminating an employee, please consult your manual.
 +<br>
 +:Department heads: please submit all work logs, progress reports and payroll summaries to the appropriate personnel ASAP. We need to assess this initiative from every angle before moving forward (or taking an even more drastic course of action).
 +<br>
 +'''Call Center Overloaded'''
 +:Wednesday, April 14th
 +<br>
 +:We're almost ready to announce the official release date for "Space Paranoids Online." Everybody wants the game, and they're letting us hear about it every hour of every day - our switchboard is on fire! After all, this is of one of the most popular games of all time.
 +<br>
 +:Our call center has been deluged with anxious inquiries - "When can I play Space Paranoids?" and "Why can't I play now?" and "I'm not playing Space Paranoids... Why is that?" Our consumers are the top priority here at Encom... and they want their Recognizers.
 +</blockquote>
 +
 +<br clear="both" />
 +
 +{| align="right" class="clipframe"
 +|[[Image:IntranetGroup7Update3.jpeg|100px]]
 +|}
 +<blockquote>
 +'''Executive Intranet Breached - Can Group 7 Be Next?'''
 +:Wednesday, April 7th
 +<br>
 +:Our security monitoring systems indicate that various users have been accessing the Group 1 and 3 levels of the employee intranet remotely. Upon further investigation, we found that these renegade hackers were using the same handful of executive passwords simultaneously. This is an alarming development - Encom prides itself on providing the best security measures in the tech world, and yet we have been breached on an epic scale.
 +<br>
 +:If you have any information as to the nature of these incidents, you must come forward immediately. We will be increasing our surveillance efforts on campuses worldwide and requiring badges to be worn at all times.
 +<br>
 +:The intruders involved will be found out and dealt with accordingly.
 +<br>
 +'''Security Overhaul Tops Our 'To-Do' List'''
 +:Wednesday, April 7th
 +<br>
 +:Our gathering in San Francisco was meant to be a positive step forward for Encom, but instead the occasion was marred by another unwelcome intrusion from above. Sporting an odd symbol on his parachute, an unnamed hooligan descended from an Encom helicopter. How did he access one of our fleet? And where will he strike next?
 +<br>
 +:Worst of all, it seems that this jumper had sympathizers amidst the crowd. How they gained admittance is a mystery, one that we will be investigating to the full extent of our abilities. We've made key changes and put a renewed focus on accountability in this area.
 +<br>
 +:In addition, we'll be challenging our work force to help us root out the source of this annoying distraction. Please be prepared to help with whatever you know about this issue when staffers pull you aside for questioning. Let's work together so we can all get back to our core mission - developing and delivering tech solutions to meet the needs of a changing globe.
 +</blockquote>
 +
 +<br clear="both" />
 +
 +{| align="right" class="clipframe"
 +|[[Image:IntranetGroup7Updates2.jpeg|100px]]
 +|}
 +<blockquote>
 +'''Company Softball League Must Adhere to Conduct Regulations'''
 +:Tuesday, March 30th
 +<br>
 +:We all know that the softball field and the office are markedly different landscapes. But we must keep in mind that anything bearing the Encom logo represents us as a company. It doesn't matter if that logo happens to appear on a helicopter, on the side of a building, or on a sports jersey; when you wear it, you own it.
 +<br>
 +:That is why we must once again stress the importance of proper behavior within our intramural softball league. Rumors of rowdy heckling and general inappropriateness have been circulating in recent weeks. Whether or not these charges have merit, they must be addressed and corrected before they reflect poorly on Encom International.
 +<br>
 +:[baseball mitt holding a baseball]
 +<br>
 +:The intramural program was implemented to promote fitness and teamwork amongst our employees. Please don't make us regret that decision. If need be, the league will be dissolved to prevent any future indiscretions from occurring.
 +<br>
'''Dress Code Enforcement''' '''Dress Code Enforcement'''
:Wednesday, March 24th :Wednesday, March 24th
<br> <br>
-:[Dirty Shoes Image]+:[worn/old converse shoes]
<br> <br>
:While there is no official dress code here at Encom, there are definite guidelines by which we must all adhere. These regulations are listed quite explicitly in your employee handbooks. If you are unfamiliar with our policies, it might behoove you to revisit this handbook and brush up on the basics. Some important highlights: :While there is no official dress code here at Encom, there are definite guidelines by which we must all adhere. These regulations are listed quite explicitly in your employee handbooks. If you are unfamiliar with our policies, it might behoove you to revisit this handbook and brush up on the basics. Some important highlights:
<br> <br>
-: * Employees must not wear any tattered garments.+:* Employees must not wear any tattered garments.
-: * Political buttons, pins, stickers and/or t-shirts must not be displayed on your person or in your workspace.+:* Political buttons, pins, stickers and/or t-shirts must not be displayed on your person or in your workspace.
-: * Your clothing must not be overly flammable.+:* Your clothing must not be overly flammable.
-: * If your jewelry can also double as a weapon, then it is unacceptable for wearing at Encom.+:* If your jewelry can also double as a weapon, then it is unacceptable for wearing at Encom.
-: * An individual's outfit must cover his/her person in a respectable manner; revealing ensembles are not allowed.+:* An individual's outfit must cover his/her person in a respectable manner; revealing ensembles are not allowed.
-: * Footwear must be appropriate for your given position (for example, you can't wear flip-flops if you work on the loading dock). Safety is paramount here at Encom.+:* Footwear must be appropriate for your given position (for example, you can't wear flip-flops if you work on the loading dock).Safety is paramount here at Encom.
-: * Please maintain a standard of cleanliness that reflects a consideration for your fellow employees and for yourself.+:* Please maintain a standard of cleanliness that reflects a consideration for your fellow employees and for yourself.
<br> <br>
:These rules are not meant to be a punishment; we just need to ensure proper conduct and decorum at all times. :These rules are not meant to be a punishment; we just need to ensure proper conduct and decorum at all times.
-<br>+</blockquote>
 + 
 +{| align="right" class="clipframe"
 +|[[Image:IntranetGroup7Updates1.jpeg|100px]]
 +|}
 +<blockquote>
'''Yearly Performance Bonuses''' '''Yearly Performance Bonuses'''
:Wednesday, March 17th :Wednesday, March 17th
Line 135: Line 403:
<br clear="both"> <br clear="both">
-===== [[Group 3]] Updates =====+ 
 +===== Group 3 Updates =====
 +{| align="right" class="clipframe"
 +|[[Image:IntranetGroup3Update2.jpeg|100px]]
 +|}
 +<blockquote>
 +'''Company Softball League: CANCELED'''
 +:Tuesday, March 30th
 +<br>
 +:Although it has always been a popular program with the employees, Encom is terminating its intramural softball program due to budget cuts. There may be protests amongst the more dedicated players, but we have already laid the groundwork for this cancellation; we are blaming it on poor conduct. Please reinforce this talking point if and when you are confronted on the matter.
 +<br>
 +:Starting next month, we will take the following steps to phase out the Encom softball league:
 +<br>
 +:* Officially announce the decision, citing the aforementioned reasons (unsportsmanlike behavior, vulgar language)
 +<br>
 +:* Collect all equipment and jerseys from employees
 +<br>
 +:* Donate said equipment to local schools and churches
 +<br>
 +:* Count donation as a corporate tax write-off
 +<br>
 +:If your workers give you any flack about this course of action, merely stress the importance of giving back to the community. If the complaints persist, proceed with disciplinary actions against the offending parties.
 +</blockquote>
 + 
{| align="right" class="clipframe" {| align="right" class="clipframe"
|[[Image:IntranetGroup3Update1.jpeg|100px]] |[[Image:IntranetGroup3Update1.jpeg|100px]]
Line 162: Line 453:
<br clear="both"> <br clear="both">
-===== [[Group 1]] Updates =====+ 
 +===== Group 1 Updates =====
 +<blockquote>
 +{| align="right" class="clipframe"
 +|[[Image:IntranetGroup1Updates2.jpeg|100px]]
 +|}
 +'''Mark Those Calendars - It's Executive Retreat Time Again'''
 +:Tuesday, March 30th
 +<br>
 +:Next quarter's executive retreat is going to be held on the white and black sand beaches of Moorea. 3 bedroom, over-the-water, bungalow suites have been reserved for all attendees and their families, complete with glass floors overlooking the tropical beauty and fish of the lagoon.
 +<br>
 +:[rectangular table with chairs on a beach]
 +<br>
 +:Due to timing, access to the company fleet will be extremely limited - so corporate travel is ready to book all airline reservations and make any other necessary arrangements.
 +<br>
 +:A complete itinerary of company meetings, working lunches, and team building excursions will be sent out soon.
 +<br>
 +:Don't forget to have your assistants fill out your 'free-time activities' forms as soon as possible. The island 4x4 safaris, sunset yacht cruises, and shark and ray feeding spots fill up quickly!
 +</blockquote>
 + 
{| align="right" class="clipframe" {| align="right" class="clipframe"
|[[Image:IntranetGroup1Updates1.jpeg|100px]] |[[Image:IntranetGroup1Updates1.jpeg|100px]]
Line 199: Line 509:
<br clear="both" /> <br clear="both" />
-==== EncomBadge Hack Account ====+==== [[Intranet/Group 7|Group 7 (Encom Badge) Account]] ====
-===== E-mail 1 =====+==== [[Intranet/Alan Bradley|Alan Bradley's Account]] ====
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:EncomIntranetHomeEmailPage1.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: JM_ACCT_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: Heeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyy!<br> +
-Monday, March 15th, 2010, 9:46am<br><br> +
-<br>+
-Killer party last weekend! So good to hang with all of you in accounts payable!<br>+
-BTW, has anyone seen Lila? I can't seem to find her... as I said - KILLER PARTY!<br>+
-<br><br>+
---Silly Jilly +
-</blockquote>+
-<br clear="both" />+==== [[Intranet/Markus Grenwald|Markus Grenwald's Account]] ====
-===== E-mail 2 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:EncomIntranetHomeEmailPage2.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: RF_RLTN_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: Cookie Sales: NOT Sanctioned by Encom<br>+
-Monday, March 15th, 2010, 3:12pm<br><br>+
-This message is being sent to everyone in your department. We do not want to name names, but<br>+
-someone has invited their child/children into the office to sell cookies for their wilderness<br>+
-club. Encom does not condone or support this practice, and we must request that you cease this behavior immediately.<br> +
-Contact me with any questions or concerns,<br><br>+
---Rita, Encom Employee Relations +
-</blockquote>+
-<br clear="both" />+==== [[Intranet/Patricia Jalardy|Patricia Jalardy's Account]] ====
-===== E-mail 3 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:EncomIntranetHomeEmailPage3.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: DG_MGMT_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: Your J-93 Report?<br>+
-Tuesday, March 16th, 2010, 11:25am<br><br>+
-Still looking for everyone's J-93's. What's the holdup?<br> +
-Don't mean to bust your chops - if you've already submitted your J for last week, good on ya. If not, please contact my administrative assistant immediately.<br> +
-See you around,<br><br>+
-:--Dan (The MANager) +
-</blockquote>+
-<br clear="both" />+==== [[Intranet/Willa Frewer|Willa Frewer's Account]] ====
-===== E-mail 4 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:EncomIntranetHomeEmailPage4.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: HY_I.T._DEPT<br>+
-Subject: Responsible Intranet Access<br> +
-Tuesday, March 16th, 2010, 2:37pm<br><br>+
-It has come to our attention that some employees are receiving non-work related emails in these<br> +
-intranet message boxes. This account is for Encom business only - please adhere to our guidelines.<br><br>+
-Thank you,<br><br>+
--- Encom I.T. Dept. +
-</blockquote>+
-<br clear="both" />+==== [[Intranet/Kurt Hardington|Kurt Hardington's Account]] ====
-===== E-mail 5 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:EncomIntranetHomeEmailPage5.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: AB_EXEC_LVL<br>+
-Subject: A new generation of techies<br> +
-Tuesday, March 16th, 2010, 5:42pm<br><br>+
-Just a quick story I wanted to share with everyone - on my way home the other day, I stopped<br> +
-at a convenience store for some snacks... Fascinating, I know, but they had an old TRON arcade<br> +
-machine next to the frozen food aisle. Some kid (not more than 10 years old) was pumping all of<br> +
-his allowance into the quarter slot and working those controls with every fiber of his being.<br> +
-When the boy's mother finally ushered him away from the game, he let out a sigh, looked at our<br>+
-old 80's logo and declared, "Someday, I'm gonna work for Encom."<br> +
-It just reminded me that we were all that kid at one point in our lives (at least, I was). We<br> +
-all dreamed of neon game grids and played the hero in our own little fantasy world. Now, we<br> +
-actually get paid to live in that world, to make it bigger and better for everyone who plays <br>+
-games or uses computers... and I, for one, am proud of that.<br> +
-Thanks for indulging me the time to recount this anecdote for y'all,<br><br>+
---Alan Bradley +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 6 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetBadgeHackEmail6.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: RF_RLTN_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: Press Conference Protocol<br>+
-Friday, March 19th, 2010, 3:03pm<br><br>+
-For those of you who plan to attend the press conference in San Francisco, you must keep in mind that you are representing Encom International.<br> +
-Everything that you do, say and wear reflecrs upon us - make sure that reflection sparkles like a diamond, won't you?<br>+
-If you are unable to adhere to these high standards, you might want to reconsider attending the press conference altogether.<br><br>+
---Rita, Encom Employee Relations+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 7 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetBadgeHackEmail7.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: DG_MGMT_DEPT<br />+
-Subject: I'm the king of middle-management!<br />+
-Tuesday, March 23rd, 2010, 12:57pm<br />+
-<br />+
-Boo-ya! Guess who was just named Mid-Manager of the Month (MMOM) by the big cheeses in corporate? It was me! This MMOM means so much to me, and I couldn't have done it without y'all. In fact, maybe I should divide the plaque into dozens of different pieces and share it with everyone... Psych!<br />+
-But, really - thanks again.<br />+
-<br />+
---Dan (the MANager)+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-===== E-mail 8 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetBadgeHackEmail8.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: JM_ACCT_DEPT<br />+
-Subject: Is it just me?<br />+
-Tuesday, March 23rd, 2010, 1:18pm<br />+
-<br />+
-...Or does Dan "The Man" ager remind you of a tiny, yapping dog that never shuts up? I used to love mothers, but now that Dan is a MMOM, I'm all turned around on the issue.<br />+
-<br />+
---Silly Jilly +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-===== E-mail 9 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetBadgeHackEmail9.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: AB_EXEC_LVL<br />+
-Subject: Looking Forward to San Francisco<br />+
-Wednesday, March 24th, 2010, 8:16am<br />+
-<br />+
-I am sincerely pleased to announce that I will be the guest speaker at our upcoming press conference. It promises to be a memorable gathering, and Encom will be right at home in a city as vibrant and progressive as San Francisco. In addition to addressing the tech world as a whole, I hope to get the chance to see some of your friendly faces in the crowd - you: the programmers, the administrators, and the designers who have defined Encom over the years. You made us what we are today... and what we could be tomorrow.<br />+
-In terms of my speech, I intend on keeping it short and simple. I'm not a showy type of guy, but I do relish my role as a spokesman for Encom. I've been through quite a lot over the course of my years with this company, and these memories will serve as the basis of my keynote speech on April 2nd.<br />+
-Until then, I'll be working on my notecards. See you all in San Francisco.<br />+
-<br />+
---Alan Bradley +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-===== E-mail 10 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetBadgeHackEmail10.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: TJ_ACCT_DEPT<br />+
-Subject: Never Again<br />+
-Monday, March 29th, 10:33am<br />+
-<br />+
-Bugs, dirt and boredom - that's how I characterize our so-called "team-building" retreat to Gnudson's Hollow.<br />+
-<br />+
-First of all, I get the tent with all the holes in it - thanks for that! Next, I get pelted by a paintball even after I refused to play. You'd better sleep with one eye open, Marsha, because I hold a grudge like nobody's business!<br />+
-<br />+
-The next time we want to bring our department together, I suggest we go bowling. Or perhaps a nice dinner. Or even a stamp-collecting party at Gene's house - anything would be better than going back to that horrible campground!<br />+
-<br />+
---Tina J., accounting+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-===== E-mail 11 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetBadgeHackEmail11.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: AB_EXEC_LVL<br />+
-Subject: Tradition vs. Innovation<br />+
-Tuesday, March 30th, 8:19am<br />+
-<br />+
-I've been getting lots of suggestions when it comes to the content of my speech this Friday. My wife, my fellow board members, my dentist - they all have something to say on the matter. While I appreciate their input, it's a bit overwhelming.<br />+
-<br />+
-But, as I was mulling over my notes, it occurred to me that the same theme ran through all of these ideas: tradition vs. innovation. That's really at the heart of it all... and that's why everyone wants to put in their two cents. It's the yin and yang of life (especially the life of a tech geek like me).<br />+
-<br />+
-We cherish the knowledge that we gained in school - it is the foundation on which we build all of our new discoveries. But, we have to challenge these truths and look past what we know and see every day if we want to break through to a new dimension of understanding.<br />+
-<br />+
-Innovation vs. tradition -I'd like to think that I'm getting better at balancing these ideas every day.<br />+
-<br />+
---Alan Bradley+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-==== Alan Bradley's Account ====+
- +
-===== E-mail 1 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetAlanBradleyEmail1.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: BL_ENG_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: I owe you ten bucks.<br>+
-Thursday, March 18th, 2010, 10:51am<br><br>+
- +
-Man, why did I bet against the home team? I can't believe I owe a bazillionaire ten bucks on a stupid call like that. You're going down next week, Bradley!<br>+
-All the guys in programming say "hi," BTW. You should swing through your old department more often - it gives everyone a real kick to<br> see how one of their own really hit the big time.<br><br>+
- +
-Laters,<br>+
---Bill<br><br>+
- +
-P.S. - That walking piece of slime, Markus Grenwald, has been saying some pretty shady stuff behind your back. I know you don't care<br>+
-about this kind of gossip, but now he's dragging Sam's name into it - just thought you should know. </blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 2 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetAlanBradleyEmail2.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: MG_MRKT_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: Best of luck, pal!<br>+
-Monday, March 22nd, 2010, 9:27am<br><br>+
- +
-From the sound of things, you're first in line to head up the latest big initiative. Couldn't go to a nicer guy, in my opinion. I've been<br>+
-putting in a good word with the big man (not that he listens to us, am I right?) <br>+
-If there's anything else I can do to help, just let me know.<br><br>+
- +
---Grenwald +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 3 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetAlanBradleyEmail3.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: BL_ENG_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: RE: I owe you ten bucks.<br>+
-Monday, March 22nd, 2010, 12:34pm<br><br>+
- +
-Yeah, I figured you knew about the whole Grenwald smear parade - you're always thinking a hundred steps ahead (another reason why I<br>+
-owe you money, you loser... or opposite of a loser, whatever that would be). And yes, I'm paying you your ten bucks - that's how a bet<br>+
-works.<br>+
-Glad you've got an eye on that Markus sitch-u (that's my cool way of saying "situation").<br><br>+
- +
---B-Town (see, I get cooler by the minute)<br><br>+
- +
- +
->You can keep the ten dollars, buddy - I just made a lucky pick.<br>+
->And in regards to Markus Grenwald, don't worry about the rumblings you might have heard. Corporate talk is often benign, but these<br>+
-words get amplified when they're taken out of context.<br>+
->Regardless of what is being said behind my back, my agenda remains pretty straightforward. No amount of gossip can affect that.<br>+
->I'll make another visit to the programming bullpen as soon as my schedule allows. Until then, try to stay out of trouble down there.<br><br>+
- +
->--Alan +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 4 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetAlanBradleyEmail4.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: The best<br>+
-Subject: Dinner?<br>+
-Tuesday, March 23rd, 2010, 3:12pm<br><br>+
- +
-So, are we having dinner tonight? Our schedules haven't been meshing so well, lately - I blame you. As you've told me on several occasions,<br>+
-I'm always right... right?<br>+
-Talk soon,<br><br>+
- +
---Your WAY better-half +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 5 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetAlanBradleyEmail5.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: The best<br />+
-Subject: San Fran<br />+
-Saturday, March 27th, 2010, 11:09am<br />+
-<br />+
-Good news - looks like my schedule is clearing up. I might (emphasis MIGHT) be able to join you at the press conference. Fingers crossed...<br />+
-Get home soon - it's Saturday!<br />+
-<br />+
---You know who+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-===== E-mail 6 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetAlanBradleyEmail6.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: KH_EXEC_LVL<br />+
-Subject: Speech<br />+
-Monday, March 29th, 2010, 12:32pm<br />+
-<br />+
-Hello Alan,<br />+
-<br />+
-Getting nervous for your big appearance this Friday? Well, don't sweat it because I'm having our Communications Director line up the best speech writers money can buy. Since there isn't much time, I need you to get together with Celia right away - In fact, I've already scheduled it on both of your calendars. I'm sure you agree how imperative it is for us to be on the same page when it comes to messaging. Don't worry, we'll make sure you sound like a real pro!<br />+
-<br />+
-Looking forward to it,<br />+
-<br />+
---Kurt+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-==== Markus Grenwald's Account ====+
- +
-===== E-mail 1 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetMGerwaldEmail1.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: KH_EXEC_LVL<br>+
-Subject: RE: Project point person<br>+
-Thursday, March 18th, 2010, 4:56pm+
-<br><br>+
-I hear your concerns and I value your offer. Truth be told, there's no one I'd rather have as our spokesman on this project than you,<br>+
-Markus. But, this decision is bigger than me - it involves our shareholders, as well.<br>+
-And please, don't worry about Alan. I'm aware that he missed some meetings in order to attend to matters with Sam Flynn (on more<br>+
-than the one occasion to which you referred), but those days are most likely behind us. What we need to do now is to focus on the job<br>+
-at hand and work together to continue this winning streak that we're enjoying here at Encom - not a lot of companies can say the same.<br><br>+
- +
-Sincerely,<br>+
-Mr. Hardington +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 2 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetMGerwaldEmail2.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: PJ_SALE_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: RE: KH, passing the buck<br>+
-Friday, March 19th, 2010, 10:57am<br><br>+
- +
-That's our "fearless leader" for ya.<br>+
-You totally deserve to run this project, Mark - you earned it.<br>+
-And it's true - Alan Bradley is unreliable. I like to spell his name "AWOL." And it wasn't just when he was CEO - it happened as<br>+
-recently as last year. He had to bail that hooligan out of the sheriff's office... again!<br><br>+
- +
-Talk soon,<br>+
---Pat +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 3 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetMGerwaldEmail3.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: AB_EXEC_LVL<br>+
-Subject: RE: Best of luck, pal!<br>+
-Monday, March 22nd, 2010, 2:34pm<br><br>+
- +
-Thanks for your kind words, Markus - good to know that the marketing team has my back on this one.<br>+
- +
-All the best,<br>+
---Alan +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 4 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetMGerwaldEmail4.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: PJ_SALE_DEPT<br />+
-Subject: Willa is your ticket in!<br />+
-Friday, March 26th, 2010, 4:16pm<br />+
-<br />+
-You've been buttering up Hardington like he's a pile of mashed potatoes, but I know you, Markus - you're not subtle. What you need is an ally on the inside, a woman's touch.<br />+
-<br />+
-Oh, I'm not talking about myself. If I could bend KH's will, don't you think I'd be bucking for a few perks of my own? No, I'm referring to Willa. She's calm and reasonable (everything we're not) and Hardington seems to listen to her. He's already suspicious of goody-goody Alan Bradley, but he's going to need a nudge to take any sort of action. Willa could give him that nudge.<br />+
-<br />+
-Just a thought.<br />+
-<br />+
---Pat+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-===== E-mail 5 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetMGerwaldEmail5.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: WF_EXEC_LVL<br />+
-Subject: RE: How was your weekend?<br />+
-Monday, March 29th, 2010, 7:54pm<br />+
-<br />+
-The weekend was nice - thanks for asking! Went antiquing with my cousin, Charlene (she found the cutest napkin rings for a VERY reasonable price). Also, I shot clay pigeons with my neighbors. It was a blast (pardon the pun)!<br />+
-<br />+
-It's funny that you e-mailed me, Markus - I might just have an opportunity for you, as it turns out. We need someone to craft Alan Bradley's speech for the press conference this weekend, and who knows the marketing game better than you, right?+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-==== Patricia Jalardy's Account ====+
- +
-===== E-mail 1 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetPatricia_JalardyEmail1.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: MG_MRKT_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: KH, passing the buck<br>+
-Friday, March 19th, 2010, 9:02am<br><br>+
- +
-Can you believe the nerve of Hardington? I ask him, point blank, to make me project lead on this big new contract and he blames the<br>+
-shareholders for rejecting my request. Fail!!<br>+
-On the upside, I think Hardington is starting to pay attention to our little campaign against Alan Bradley. He has also noticed Bradley's<br>+
-lack of commitment - don't know what good it will do me, but it can't hurt to take down Encom's golden boy a peg, right?<br><br>+
- +
-Tell me if you hear anything,<br>+
---MG +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 2 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetPatriciaJalardyEmail2.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: SW_ACCT_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: RE: Sales projections threatened<br>+
-Friday, March 19th, 2010, 1:15pm<br><br>+
- +
-As your trusted friend (and the gal who saw you through two messy divorces), I’ve gotta tell you – I proofed that report you were thinking<br>+
-of sending to Kurt Hardington and I don’t think your arguments hold water. I know you had a disagreement with Alan Bradley, but<br>+
-blaming his initiatives for a potential drop in sales growth? That seems far-fetched. And sales haven’t even dropped, truth be told.<br>+
-Sure, Bradley convinced the board that it was better to give customers free anti-virus software updates (thus reducing waste<br>+
-and blah-blah-who-cares). And sure, you could have sold more copies of the new software if you had won the argument (what’s the product<br> +
-name? Compu-Scrub? On second thought, I don’t think that would have sold so well). But, blaming him for your department’s woes<br>+
-seems like tattling. And, to reiterate: SALES ARE FINE. Just not as much as you had projected. So, focus on your successes and<br> +
-ditch the excuses – Hardington would have seen right through them, anyway.<br>+
-Oh, and on the topic of moneybags Hardington, what’s his deal? Maybe he could be divorce #3 for you (he’d pay a heck of a lot more<br> +
-alimony that those other two dullards). Think about it…<br><br>+
- +
-Call me,<br>+
---Stephi +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 3 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetPatriciaJalardyEmail3.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: Dr. Lee<br>+
-Subject: Session cancelled<br>+
-Tuesday, March 23rd, 2010, 4:12pm<br><br>+
- +
-This message is to confirm that my office did, in fact, receive your request to cancel this week's therapy session. Although I will honor<br> +
-your wishes, I must reiterate my professional opinion: that this is no time to waiver on the groundbreaking work we have achieved as of<br> +
-late. Your propensity to blame others for your professional issues is waning and you have learned to start taking responsibility for your<br> +
-own success and/or failure.<br>+
-I suggest we reschedule at your earliest convenience - we don't want to squander the progress we have made thus far.<br><br>+
- +
---Dr. Lee +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 4 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetPatriciaJalardyEmail4.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: MG_MRKT_DEPT<br />+
-Subject: RE: Willa is your ticket in!<br />+
-Friday, March 26th, 2010, 4:16pm<br />+
-<br />+
-Thanks, Pat. You've got a smart head on those shoulders... I guess that's why we get along so well.<br />+
-<br />+
-I'll let you know how it goes.<br />+
-<br />+
---MG+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-===== E-mail 5 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetPatriciaJalardyEmail5.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: MG_MRKT_DEPT<br />+
-Subject: RE: Willa is your ticket in!<br />+
-Monday, March 29th, 8:01pm<br />+
-<br />+
-OK, so I've greased the wheels and I think I can wedge my way into this project (as a speechwriter - weird, huh?).<br />+
-<br />+
-Speaking of weird, Willa is flightier than those clay pigeons she shoots. Hope I don't have to be too friendly to her (might hurt my reputation as a total jerk).<br />+
-<br />+
-Thanks again for the heads-up!<br />+
-<br />+
---MG+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-==== Willa Frewer's Account ====+
- +
-===== E-mail 1 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetWillaFrewerEmail1.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: Timmy the landscaper<br>+
-Subject: Roses<br>+
-Thursday, March 18th, 2010, 11:19am<br><br>+
- +
-Just wanted to let you know that we have those rosebushes you ordered - they're in our greenhouse now and ready for pickup. Should<br>+
-we charge them to your account?<br>+
-Sorry to hear about the ficus tree - just be glad about that whole "lightning never strikes twice" saying... Oh, I hope it's not too soon to<br>+
-joke about the lightning bolt that killed your ficus.<br><br>+
- +
---Timmy +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 2 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetWillaFrewerEmail2.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: BP_STAF_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: Is Mr. Bradley so bad?<br>+
-Thursday, March 18th, 2010, 9:07pm<br><br>+
- +
-What's with all this negativity I've been hearing? You're in the inner-circle, Willa - any ideas? I'm sure as sugar not going to put my job<br> +
-at risk by asking too many questions, but it seems like Alan Bradley doesn't deserve these whisper-attacks that are coming at him<br> +
-from all sides. At least you've stayed above the muck - then again, you've always been a classy lady.<br><br>+
- +
-From another classy lady,<br>+
---Betts (a.k.a. Betsy) +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 3 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetWillaFrewerEmail3.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: Jack<br>+
-Subject: RE: I feel guilty<br>+
-Monday, March 22nd, 2010, 8:43am<br><br>+
- +
-In a word: don't. Don't feel guilty for siding with the powers-that-be when it comes to questioning Alan Bradley. That's just the corporate<br> +
-world, right? You've got to position yourself in the most beneficial way - befriend all parties concerned and be ready for anything.<br>+
-It doesn't matter if Alan Bradley is the hero in all of this or not - are you willing to stake your reputation on it? Or your job? Be smart<br> +
-about this, Willa.<br><br>+
- +
---Jack +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 4 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetWillaFrewerEmail4.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: MG_MRKT_DEPT<br />+
-Subject: How was your weekend?<br />+
-Monday, March 29th, 2010, 9:45am<br />+
-<br />+
-Hi, Willa! We never get to talk these days. How are you?<br />+
-<br />+
-Just wanted to drop you a line and let you know how much I miss the old days - we should schedule more strategy meetings like we used to have.<br />+
-<br />+
-Oh, and have you heard anything about the press conference? I was slated to be point person on this initiative, but it went to Alan Bradley instead (no hard feelings on this end, though - LOL!)<br />+
-<br />+
-Talk soon (I hope),<br />+
-<br />+
---Marketing Markus (remember? That's what you used to call me! Soooo funny!)+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-===== E-mail 5 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetWillaFrewerEmail5.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: KH_EXEC_LVL<br />+
-Subject: Who can we put on this?<br />+
-Monday, March 29th, 2010, 11:02am<br />+
-<br />+
-I've decided that we need to mitigate this Alan Bradley situation by exercising message control. Who are the best speechwriters we've used in the past couple of years?<br />+
-<br />+
-Call me when you have someone lined up.<br />+
-<br />+
---Kurt+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-==== Kurt Hardington's Account ====+
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== Email 1 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetKurtHardingtonEmail1.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: MG_MRKT_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: Project point person<br>+
-Thursday, March 18th, 2010, 12:14pm<br><br>+
- +
-Excuse me for breaking protocol and contacting you directly, sir, but I was just so inspired by the brief conversation (or "convo," to use<br> +
-your hilarious turn of phrase) - the convo we had in the elevator last week. Remember?<br>+
-Well, I wanted to express my gratitude to you for taking the time to explain the new initiative to me - exciting stuff! I officially want<br> +
-to nominate myself as the face of this new product. I know that Alan Bradley might be the more obvious choice, but I truly worry about that<br> +
-decision. We all know how he put Sam Flynn's needs ahead of Encom's back when we needed his leadership most. He was a CEO,<br> +
-not a babysitter.<br>+
-Don't get me wrong - Alan is a great man. I just think this project was made for me.<br><br>+
- +
-Thanks again for your time,<br>+
---Markus Grenwald, VP of Marketing +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== Email 2 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetKurtHardingtonEmail2.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: HY_I.T. DEPT<br>+
-Subject: Remote Desktop Access<br>+
-Thursday, March 18th, 2010, 2:49pm<br><br>+
- +
-Kurt,+
-I've had my team enable your Remote Access account so you can browse the company intranet from wherever you might be. As we<br> +
-discussed in the last status meeting, not all planned features are currently completed but the core functionality you were requesting is<br> +
-available. To access it, just click the link below:<br><br>+
- +
-[http://www.encominternational.com/employeeintranet/rdp/ Remote Desktop Access]<br><br>+
- +
-Call me if you have any questions or concerns or encounter any difficulties.<br>+
---Harold, ENCOM I.T. DEPT. +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-Note: This email contains a link to [[Hardington's Desktop]]+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== Email 3 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetKurtHardingtonEmail3.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: PJ_SALE_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: Sales projections holding steady<br>+
-Friday, March 19th, 2010, 3:08pm<br><br>+
- +
-Good afternoon, Mr. Hardington<br>+
-Our comprehensive sales report should be on its way to your office (via courier) as we speak, but I just wanted to contact you directly<br> +
-and assure you that our projections proved largely reliable.<br>+
-If you would like to discuss this data at any point in the near future, you can always reach me through my secretary.<br><br>+
- +
-Have a great day!<br>+
---Patricia Jalardy, Head of Sales at Encom International +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== Email 4 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetKurtHardingtonEmail4.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: Chair Guyz<br>+
-Subject: Thank you for your purchase!<br>+
-Monday, March 22nd, 2010, 9:27am<br><br>+
- +
-Our records show that you purchased an item from our company just one month ago. Since satisfaction is our top priority, we wanted<br> +
-to make sure that the office chair and/or recliner was up to your high standards.<br><br>+
- +
-Please contact us with any questions or concerns.<br>+
---Kenneth, customer relations, Chair Guyz +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== Email 5 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetKurtHardingtonEmail5.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: FD_STAF_DEPT<br>+
-Subject: Gretchen checked in<br>+
-Tuesday, March 23rd, 2010, 6:22pm<br><br>+
- +
-She called to let me know that she just put the ointment on Princess' eczema patch - I'm so glad I'm your office assistant and not your<br> +
-personal assistant.<br>+
-Bottom line: she's doing fine. I mean Princess, not Gretchen.<br><br>+
- +
---Faith +
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 6 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetKurtHardingtonEmail6.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: CM_COMM_DEPT<br />+
-Subject: You made the right call<br />+
-Thursday, March 25th, 2010, 8:17pm<br />+
-<br />+
-I understand that you were hesitant to give Bradley the press conference, but the response has been ideal. Gamers and bloggers will come out of the woodwork to hear what he has to say -expect a huge debut for your new release.<br />+
-<br />+
-And now that I've earned your trust (tentatively, I'm sure), we should move on to our next point of order: message control. I've got a number of talented speechwriters who can keep Bradley focused on the company, the product, and the future - then, you won't have to worry about him going on and on about Kevin Flynn again (although, that's a name that also really draws the crowds - you might want to reconsider your stance on this issue).<br />+
-<br />+
-Do you want me broach the speechwriting subject with Alan, or should you?<br />+
-<br />+
---Celia, Communications Director+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
- +
-===== E-mail 7 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetKurtHardingtonEmail7.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: CM_COMM_DEPT<br />+
-Subject: RE: You made the right call<br />+
-Friday, March 26th, 2010, 10:22am<br />+
-<br />+
-Yes, but you won't have your finger on the "edit" button in San Fran - remember, this is a live event.<br />+
-<br />+
->I keep Bradley on a short leash - did you see how I cut down that IGN interview before it got released?<br />+
->[http://www.encominternational.com/employeeintranet/bradley_long.htm bradley_long.mov]<br />+
->Don't worry about contacting Bradley - I'll inform him that we'll be writing the speech for him and that you'll be following up soon.<br />+
->BTW - keep Flynn out of it.<br />+
-<br />+
->--Hardington+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 8 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetKurtHardingtonEmail8.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: AB_EXEC_LVL<br />+
-Subject: RE: Speech<br />+
-Monday, March 29th, 2010, 3:47pm<br />+
-<br />+
-Sure Kurt, I understand completely. I know exactly how much public perception means to you and Encom. I'll make sure to touch base with Ms. Melardin as soon as I can.<br />+
-<br />+
-Thanks for all your help.<br />+
-<br />+
---Alan+
-</blockquote>+
- +
-<br clear="both" />+
-===== E-mail 9 =====+
-{| align="right" class="clipframe"+
-|[[Image:IntranetKurtHardingtonEmail9.jpeg|100px]]+
-|}+
-<blockquote>+
-Sender: CM_COMM_DEPT<br />+
-Subject: Alan's In!<br />+
-Tuesday, March 30th, 2010, 8:06am<br />+
-<br />+
-Good news. I sat down with Bradley this morning and went over the speech we wrote for him - Looks like he's going to play ball. He didn't even flinch when I brought up the fact that we're cutting out all mention of Kevin Flynn for the evening to focus on Encom's future and innovation.<br />+
-<br />+
---Celia, Communications Director+
-</blockquote>+
<br clear="both" /> <br clear="both" />
----- 
[[Category:Incomplete]] [[Category:Incomplete]]

Current revision

[edit] Encom Employee Intranet

Contents

This page is intended as a backup / mirror of the site and the changes that may occur over time. If you see something changed, please log the details with a date.

[edit] March 17, 2010

First referenced via QR Code printed on the Encom Employee Badges received by mail.

[edit] March 25, 2010

Arcadeaid.com provides a tool to crack employee logins, revealing the employee IDs and passwords for a number of Encom employees.

[edit] April 7, 2010

Attempting to access the accounts gained through Arcadeaid.com/Cheatcode brings up the following message:

ACCESS INFRACTION!
You have entered a password that is no longer valid.
We recently purged the system of users who were attempting to hack into various executives’ intranet pages - THIS IS A SERIOUS OFFENSE.
If you have any information as to the identities of these individuals, you should immediately forward the information to the appropriate supervisor.
However, if you are an executive who has accidentally entered an old password, please accept our apologies for the inconvenience. Our Technical Staff will coordinate with your assistants to reestablish your access with no further disruption to you.

[edit] May 13, 2010

As indicated by a thread on the Flynn Lives message boards, attempting to log in with a Group 7 badge ID yields the following response:

SYSTEM UNDER MAINTENANCE
We're sorry, but the Encom Employee Intranet is currently undergoing some restructuring and cannot be accessed at this time. If you have any questions or concerns, please consult your immediate supervisor.
Thank you for your cooperation.


[edit] Content

[edit] Login

Login page of Encom's Intranet
Login page of Encom's Intranet

Portal login for Encom International's intranet.

  • Valid login for players consists of: Encom Employee Number / FlynnLives.com profile password
  • Valid logins for Encom staff are listed at Cheatcode


[edit] Home Page

Home page of Encom's Intranet,Updated
Home page of Encom's Intranet,Updated
[edit] Announcements and Notices

Week of May 3-7, 2010
"Space Paranoids" Is Here

We have conquered the glitches, programming issues and general peculiarities of "Space Paranoids Online" and we're pleased to announce that the program is finally ready for public consumption.


This online release already has a built-in fanbase (seeing as how it's based on one of the most popular arcade games of all time), but it also boasts some brand new features, including:


  • Advanced tank design


  • More levels


  • Greater firepower


  • New enemies


  • Cool sound effects


Are we ready for the next phase of Encom's unparalleled success? Get on board, because this tank is charging toward a bright future, and there's no turning back!


20 Years of Dedication

Even before the whole "global warming" debate began, Alan Bradley was committed to conservation, ecology and renewable solutions. In the past, Encom used a vast network of smaller companies to ship our products to markets around the world – redundancies and spotty management led to wastefulness of time and resources. Encom required dependable, dedicated transport services and Alan Bradley saw the opportunity for us to save money and reinvent overseas distribution.


Our Dumont Shipping line is now the green standard in sustainable transport -- we're leading the way in keeping our oceans healthy, not to mention consolidating our efforts in rail, trucking and air shipments, as well.


Week of April 26-30
A Five-Star Hiring Shift

Our employees deserve the very best of everything. That's why we have just overhauled the kitchen staff at Encom commissaries around the world. The new hires (including some of the most promising chefs from Paris, New York and Tokyo) will be better equipped to provide a true gourmet dining experience for you, our cherished workers. For instance, "Hot dog Tuesdays" will be replaced by "Mardi avec Duck à l'Orange." C'est magnifique!


DISCLAIMER: Due to the exotic nature of the ingredients our new staff will be using, you might endure some strange allergic reactions to the updated menu items. Encom International is not responsible for such an occurrence - check the nutritional data of your food before eating it.


Week of April 19-23, 2010
Annual Blood Drive

It's that time of year again: Encom International is encouraging, but in no way requiring, employees to donate blood next week. This is our chance to give back to the community, to band together as a team, and to show the world what a benevolent organization we really are.


Studies indicate that one quarter (25%) of Americans will require a blood transfusion at some time in their lives. Unfortunately, only about 5% of all healthy citizens actually give to the cause. Will it be your spouse, your parent, or your child who needs the next batch? How can we turn our backs to those in need?


For those of you who are interested in participating, please check your local branch for specific donation times, locations and further details. Thank you in advance for helping, and for putting Encom at the top of the list when it comes to philanthropic initiatives.


EncomInternational.com Is the Toast of the Internet

We logged a record number of hits to our website last week - congratulations are in order! This just proves that the Encom brand is as vibrant as ever and the masses are ready to see what's ahead on the horizon.


Week of April 12-16, 2010
Coming Soon to a Browser Near You...

We're still firing on all cylinders to get Space Paranoids Online... well, online. But, in the meantime, check out the teaser trailer, complete with a sneak peek of new tanks and levels!


We're still working out the final programming details, but this should tide over our rabid fanbase until we have a firm release date.


Kurt Hardington Makes the "Most Generous" List

In an independently funded exposé on the biggest philanthropists in America, Encom's own Kurt Hardington ranked #87 when it comes to charitable donations for the past fiscal year. We've always known that our CEO is a giving, nurturing person, but now the rest of the world has proof. Congratulations, Mr. Hardington - you may be #87 on their list, but you're #1 on ours!


Week of April 5-9, 2010
"Space Paranoids" Nears Final Beta-Testing Stage

Ever since Alan Bradley told the world that an arcade favorite, Space Paranoids, would be arriving soon via the internet, consumers' response has been thunderous. Fans are ready for the next era in Encom gaming, and we're ready to deliver. Unfortunately, our quality control efforts over the past few weeks and months have not been completely fruitful. "Space Paranoids Online" contains an alarming number of glitches, programming issues and general peculiarities - QC will have to be stepped up immediately.


[Space Paranoids logo]


IMPORTANT: As always, this information is confidential. Encom never promised an exact date of release for "Space Paranoids," so we can move forward with our rollout in a manner that best showcases the product and our company brand as a whole.


Encom Welcomes New Head of Transportation


Our recent press event in San Francisco illuminated some real pros and cons when it comes to Encom's transpo detail. Sure, we have increased efficiency 18% over the past two years. And yes, accidents are down 26% for that same time period. And, of course, our fleet of choppers is the best looking fleet in corporate America.


[smiling suit & tie man with a few people in blurred background]


However, security and accountability have been somewhat of an issue as of late. That's why Nate Hardington has been named Encom's new Head of Transportation, effective immediately. His proud uncle, Kurt, is sure that Nate is the perfect man for the job. "I remember when little Nate was playing with toy trucks and boats. Well now, he's in charge of a worldwide armada of trucks and boats – it seems only fitting."


Week of March 29-April 2, 2010
Alan Bradley Represents the Very Best of Encom

Don't forget... the Encom Press Conference is taking place at 8PM this Friday, April 2nd, at the Justin Herman Plaza in downtown San Francisco. This year will be very special indeed, as the main address will be given by none other than – Alan Bradley.


[Alan Bradley close up pic]


With his decades of unrivaled experience, Mr. Bradley is the perfect representative to announce our product plans to the world and usher in this new era of Encom.


All local employees are expected to attend. If you signed up previously as a volunteer to help with this event, please check with your immediate supervisor for your assignment and schedule.


Team Building Exercise a Resounding Success

Birds chirping in a field... wind whistling through the meadow... a paintball nugget smacking Tina from accounting. These were the sounds of our annual team-building retreat to Gnudson's Hollow.


[cranes building the word TEAM]


It was four days and three nights of increased communication, trust exercises and camaraderie. Never before have we been so unified as a team, and never again will we have to witness Gene performing the hokey-pokey in Pig Latin (hopefully).


So, I say a hearty "thank you" to all of my new friends and old co-workers. Hope to see you all back there next year!


Week of March 22-26, 2010

Fringe Group Gaining Momentum

While the entire staff here at Encom mourns the disappearance (and probable death) of our former CEO, Kevin Flynn, we cannot just stand idly by and watch as his name is martyred for reasons unknown. A group calling themselves Flynn Lives has been increasing its membership steadily over the past few weeks and this could be immensely disruptive for the Flynn family... and for Encom as a whole.


[Flynn Lives Image]


What does this organization hope to achieve? They purport that they want to find Kevin Flynn, but he vanished over two decades ago. Do they really expect to rescue his ghost? Their efforts seem futile, at best.


All of the renewed attention that Flynn Lives has been garnering could very well cast aspersions on our company. Why did he leave? Was Encom in any way involved? While we all know that our corporation had absolutely nothing to do with Flynn's mysterious circumstances, do we want these questions to be asked in the papers? On the street? On the trading floor of the stock market?


Encom is a forward thinking company. Looking backwards can only bring trouble.


More QC Workers Hired

While we continue to move forward on our latest Quality Control initiative, the scope of this project has proven to be more unwieldy than we had foreseen. Therefore, we have taken steps to rectify the situation by hiring another tier of QC personnel.


[Question Mark Idea Image]


This reconfiguration of our staff will have ramifications on the annual budget of the R&D wing here at Encom; please adjust your numbers accordingly. Also, we will be ordering more office equipment (desks, computers, lamps - to name a few items), which must be distributed without haste.


Make no mistake: with everyone's cooperation, we will get this effort back on track, hopefully sooner rather than later.


Week of March 15-19, 2010

QC Initiative Enters Phase One

Quality Control is vital to the inner-workings of our company. That's why we have just allocated the necessary funds and workspace to facilitate all of the new employees who will be carrying out some much-needed product testing on a title that we plan to release in the upcoming months.


[Good Better Best Image]


To those of you in HR, please make sure that these new recruits file their start paperwork on time and sign the necessary NDA's – we don't want the competition getting wind of our plans before we're ready to announce the next big Encom product to the world. Such a confidentiality leak would result in swift investigations and probable firings.


Run High for Upcoming Announcement

The Encom press conference will take place less than three weeks from now, and our west coast affiliates are brimming with anticipation. Hotels are already filling up due to the hectic schedule of that weekend, so plan accordingly. Travelers are urged to finalize their schedules, submit them in writing to the appropriate coordinator and cc your itinerary to your supervisor.


[Picture of City]


E-Mail Etiquette

Just a friendly reminder: slang terms, obscenities and the excessive use of emoticons are not welcome in any Encom-sanctioned correspondence. This comment is in no way targeted at one specific individual, but merely serves as a guideline for all future e-mails. The following terms and symbols have recently been added to our watchlist and will, from this point forward, be flagged for further investigation:


-- LOL


-- : )


-- BRB


-- <3


-- BFF


-- Chillaxin'


Thank you in advance for your compliance to these regulations.


[edit] Group 7 Updates
Hard Work Pays Off
Thursday, May 6th

Now that Space Paranoids is blasting its way onto computers around the globe, it’s time to congratulate all of the programmers, sales reps and other employees who made this project come to life. Thousands of man-hours went into developing “S.P. Online,” and we don’t want anything to sully the good name of this product… or Encom as a whole.

That’s why we must remind you not to dwell on any issues you may have with the finished product.

Lots of games are released with slight idiosyncrasies still lurking in their code, but we don’t need to publicize the matter. After all, this is a classic title that was created decades ago – the peculiarities are what give Space Paranoids its charm.

New Policy – Illnesses Must Be Proven
Thursday, May 6th

Our records show that several employees have been using up their sick days just before they expire. The coincidence seems suspicious, so Encom is now implementing our latest policy: doctors’ notes will be required for all absences.

However, don’t try and game the system by getting an excuse from just any physician. The following is a list of specialists from whom we will NOT accept doctors’ notes:

  • Podiatrists

  • Chiropractors

  • Pediatricians

  • Botanists

Be advised: any unexcused absences will result in loss of salary and/or disciplinary action, possibly termination.


McClaskey Airstrip Welcomes Back Group 7
Wednesday, April 28th

We are happy to report that a missing company helicopter has turned up, safe and sound, at McClaskey Airstrip, home to Encom's executive fleet of aircraft. Our longstanding travel partners chalked it up to an inventory mishap, while a note found attached to the pilot door read, "I'm leaving the bird back where I found it - thanks!" Since the communiqué wasn't signed, it is assumed that one of the maintenance crew wrote it after relocating the chopper from one hangar to another.

Due to these recent developments, the moratorium placed on Group 7 travel through McClaskey has been lifted, and all groups may revert back to standard travel protocol procedures as they pertain to their respective departments.

Also, there have been a number of changes in security measures, so it is advised that all travelers allow for extra time to pre-board their respective flights.

Giving Blood Does Not Excuse You From Your Work Duties
Friday, April 23rd

Just to be clear: if you decide to donate blood as part of our annual drive, you must schedule your procedure on a designated break or lunch hour. We don't want a repeat of last year (when Group 7 productivity for the week fell an unprecedented 12%).

Once you have finished with your civic responsibilities, you need to attend to your Encom responsibilities. You will not be excused for reasons of fatigue, nausea or faintness (we have heard these stories before - they just won't be accepted).

QC Hiring Freeze In Effect
Wednesday, April 14th

Until further notice, we are not bringing on any new testers for our forthcoming line of products. In fact, we might be letting go of our last crop of hires sooner than expected. If you have questions as to the protocol involved with terminating an employee, please consult your manual.

Department heads: please submit all work logs, progress reports and payroll summaries to the appropriate personnel ASAP. We need to assess this initiative from every angle before moving forward (or taking an even more drastic course of action).

Call Center Overloaded
Wednesday, April 14th

We're almost ready to announce the official release date for "Space Paranoids Online." Everybody wants the game, and they're letting us hear about it every hour of every day - our switchboard is on fire! After all, this is of one of the most popular games of all time.

Our call center has been deluged with anxious inquiries - "When can I play Space Paranoids?" and "Why can't I play now?" and "I'm not playing Space Paranoids... Why is that?" Our consumers are the top priority here at Encom... and they want their Recognizers.


Executive Intranet Breached - Can Group 7 Be Next?
Wednesday, April 7th

Our security monitoring systems indicate that various users have been accessing the Group 1 and 3 levels of the employee intranet remotely. Upon further investigation, we found that these renegade hackers were using the same handful of executive passwords simultaneously. This is an alarming development - Encom prides itself on providing the best security measures in the tech world, and yet we have been breached on an epic scale.

If you have any information as to the nature of these incidents, you must come forward immediately. We will be increasing our surveillance efforts on campuses worldwide and requiring badges to be worn at all times.

The intruders involved will be found out and dealt with accordingly.

Security Overhaul Tops Our 'To-Do' List
Wednesday, April 7th

Our gathering in San Francisco was meant to be a positive step forward for Encom, but instead the occasion was marred by another unwelcome intrusion from above. Sporting an odd symbol on his parachute, an unnamed hooligan descended from an Encom helicopter. How did he access one of our fleet? And where will he strike next?

Worst of all, it seems that this jumper had sympathizers amidst the crowd. How they gained admittance is a mystery, one that we will be investigating to the full extent of our abilities. We've made key changes and put a renewed focus on accountability in this area.

In addition, we'll be challenging our work force to help us root out the source of this annoying distraction. Please be prepared to help with whatever you know about this issue when staffers pull you aside for questioning. Let's work together so we can all get back to our core mission - developing and delivering tech solutions to meet the needs of a changing globe.


Company Softball League Must Adhere to Conduct Regulations
Tuesday, March 30th

We all know that the softball field and the office are markedly different landscapes. But we must keep in mind that anything bearing the Encom logo represents us as a company. It doesn't matter if that logo happens to appear on a helicopter, on the side of a building, or on a sports jersey; when you wear it, you own it.

That is why we must once again stress the importance of proper behavior within our intramural softball league. Rumors of rowdy heckling and general inappropriateness have been circulating in recent weeks. Whether or not these charges have merit, they must be addressed and corrected before they reflect poorly on Encom International.

[baseball mitt holding a baseball]

The intramural program was implemented to promote fitness and teamwork amongst our employees. Please don't make us regret that decision. If need be, the league will be dissolved to prevent any future indiscretions from occurring.

Dress Code Enforcement
Wednesday, March 24th

[worn/old converse shoes]

While there is no official dress code here at Encom, there are definite guidelines by which we must all adhere. These regulations are listed quite explicitly in your employee handbooks. If you are unfamiliar with our policies, it might behoove you to revisit this handbook and brush up on the basics. Some important highlights:

  • Employees must not wear any tattered garments.
  • Political buttons, pins, stickers and/or t-shirts must not be displayed on your person or in your workspace.
  • Your clothing must not be overly flammable.
  • If your jewelry can also double as a weapon, then it is unacceptable for wearing at Encom.
  • An individual's outfit must cover his/her person in a respectable manner; revealing ensembles are not allowed.
  • Footwear must be appropriate for your given position (for example, you can't wear flip-flops if you work on the loading dock).Safety is paramount here at Encom.
  • Please maintain a standard of cleanliness that reflects a consideration for your fellow employees and for yourself.

These rules are not meant to be a punishment; we just need to ensure proper conduct and decorum at all times.
Yearly Performance Bonuses
Wednesday, March 17th
It's tax season again, so all department heads must file the necessary paperwork regarding this year's bonuses for sales and development personnel – please disseminate this information accordingly.

[Picture Puzzle Money]

We will be issuing checks the week before April 15th but, due to recent budget cuts, several restrictions have been applied to the process, including the following:
  • Only those employees with a consistent record with Encom for at least five (5) years are eligible for bonus evaluation.
  • Only those employees working more than 50 hours per week, on average, will be eligible for bonus evaluation.
  • This year, bonuses will max out at 20% less than last year (again, due to budget cuts).
Please be advised: Encom will allow no exceptions to these rules.

Expense Reports: A Cautionary Tale
Wednesday, March 17th
The accounting department has been inundated with expense reports that violate Encom's clearly defined spending policies. Despite the fact that these rules are fully articulated in your employee handbooks, please reacquaint yourself with the following restrictions:
  • If you choose to bring your spouse and/or children with you on a business trip, be aware their expenses are not covered.
  • In regards to business meals, servicepersons' gratuities are not covered.
  • Encom will only reimburse expenses claimed within a reasonable time frame (nothing from 60 days or older).

[Picture calculator]

While there are several other egregious infractions in this latest round of expense reports, those are the issues we are encountering most often. Please correct this misuse of corporate funds in the future.


[edit] Group 3 Updates
Company Softball League: CANCELED
Tuesday, March 30th

Although it has always been a popular program with the employees, Encom is terminating its intramural softball program due to budget cuts. There may be protests amongst the more dedicated players, but we have already laid the groundwork for this cancellation; we are blaming it on poor conduct. Please reinforce this talking point if and when you are confronted on the matter.

Starting next month, we will take the following steps to phase out the Encom softball league:

  • Officially announce the decision, citing the aforementioned reasons (unsportsmanlike behavior, vulgar language)

  • Collect all equipment and jerseys from employees

  • Donate said equipment to local schools and churches

  • Count donation as a corporate tax write-off

If your workers give you any flack about this course of action, merely stress the importance of giving back to the community. If the complaints persist, proceed with disciplinary actions against the offending parties.
Yearly Executive Bonuses
Wednesday, March 24th
It's tax season again, so all executive-level bonuses will be processed/deposited/wired to the appropriate accounts in the upcoming weeks. It's been a lucrative year for Encom; we've got a lot to be proud of. Just take a look at some of these statistics:

[Dollar sign and money puzzle]

  • Our retirement bonuses have increased an average of 23% when compared to last year - we really polished up those golden parachutes!
  • We've catapulted three new execs into the Encom Billionaires' Club - congratulations, we make it worth your while to stick with Encom.
  • Our top-tier management personnel is now (unofficially) ranked #3 in the world in terms of average wealth. Nicely done, and just below the scrutiny radar.

Congratulations to everyone on a groundbreaking 2009. We look forward to a prosperous 2010 and rewarding those who get us there.
Outsourcing: A Policy That's Really Going Places
Wednesday, March 24th
Outsourcing continues to prove quite beneficial for Encom. Our field offices are leveraging positive press for the regional jobs increases, and our overhead has never been so low. This is how we will stay competitive, this is where the future of business is headed, and this is why we need to stay ahead of public opinion.:

[Outsourcing arrow sign]

Is profiting from one's hard work and innovation a crime? If so, perhaps Encom is in the wrong business. Our company must follow the most direct path to financial success, and the sign above that path reads, "Outsourcing."


[edit] Group 1 Updates

Mark Those Calendars - It's Executive Retreat Time Again

Tuesday, March 30th


Next quarter's executive retreat is going to be held on the white and black sand beaches of Moorea. 3 bedroom, over-the-water, bungalow suites have been reserved for all attendees and their families, complete with glass floors overlooking the tropical beauty and fish of the lagoon.


[rectangular table with chairs on a beach]


Due to timing, access to the company fleet will be extremely limited - so corporate travel is ready to book all airline reservations and make any other necessary arrangements.


A complete itinerary of company meetings, working lunches, and team building excursions will be sent out soon.


Don't forget to have your assistants fill out your 'free-time activities' forms as soon as possible. The island 4x4 safaris, sunset yacht cruises, and shark and ray feeding spots fill up quickly!
Budget Cuts in the Wake of Success
Wednesday, March 24th
It's true: we're making more money than ever. Revenue from sales is at an all-time high, mergers and acquisitions are accelerating at an unprecedented rate, and Encom is on track to chart record profits for this quarter...

[Changes traffic image]

Let's keep the momentum going. Effective immediately, we are starting a mandatory staff reorganization initiative. Categorize your employees according to highest salary, highest unpaid bonuses or stock commitments (let's truncate as many of these as possible), and flag any recent hires who are ready to take on more responsibility for less pay. Please note: all cuts must be made by the end of March.
Sure, this won't make us popular, but it's the perfect time to enact a massive round of layoffs. After all, in these tough economic times, every company is downsizing - why should Encom be any different?

Employee Loyalty at an All-Time High
Wednesday, March 24th
Despite our recent reduction of healthcare benefits and elimination of the 401k Employer Matching Funds program, a recent in-house poll of Encom workers shows their allegiance to our corporation going through the roof. Just look at these numbers:
  • Appreciative of current leadership - 73%
  • Striving to help create a superior product - 86%
  • Clearly understanding the parameters of one's position - 68%
  • Confidence in co-workers' job performance - 53%
  • Unwilling to look elsewhere for employment - 59%
  • Propensity to organize into labor unions - 11%

[upward graph line,happy stick figure]

While that 11% faction does give us pause, the other statistics are reason for celebration. After all, a happy workforce is a productive workforce.


[edit] Verbisware E-mail System

[edit] Index page

E-mail page of Encom's Intranet
E-mail page of Encom's Intranet
  • Includes subject sender and date time stamp size and status for all mails in inbox
  • Status does not seem to change after you view the messages...


[edit] Group 7 (Encom Badge) Account

[edit] Alan Bradley's Account

[edit] Markus Grenwald's Account

[edit] Patricia Jalardy's Account

[edit] Willa Frewer's Account

[edit] Kurt Hardington's Account


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